Where has the time gone?

Jacob riding “his” pony named Chips

Every now and then I see a photo of Jacob from one or two years ago. Even the photos from just a year ago make me wonder where the time has gone. People are correct. They grow so fast that if you blink, you will miss a lot. 

Sometimes I look at Miles and remember what Jacob was like at his age. It doesn’t seem like it was almost three years ago. Three years is a long time. But here he is, closing in on his third birthday and he is communicating with us much more clearly than I could have imagined. He has his own distinct personality. His own likes and dislikes. He even tries to trick is sometimes to get his way.

Where did the time go? I feel like I missed a lot for some reason. I didn’t, but he has grown so fast, it just feels that way. I keep thinking that I need to just sit there and stare at Miles to fully appreciate these moments that go by so quickly. He is already smiling and wondering about the things around him. Looking at him and then realizing in less than three short years, he will be where Jacob is – it makes me emotional.

Jacob even knows how to show me that he loves me. He gives me kisses and hugs all the time and it just melts my heart. I never want to let go. They are perfect moments. Just as perfect as the first time I held him in my arms. 

Then I see him playing on his iPad, going from app to app and interacting with each. He has been doing that for some time now. He is so big. He figures things out so fast. Sometimes I just want him to be that little guy that needed us to carry him everywhere. At the same time, I love his independence and eternal quest for joy. He loves his family. He loves loves loves his baby brother. He loves his friends. He loves his Lord. He loves his music. He loves so much. There is so much love in his heart. 

I am proud of who he is. He gets into trouble, but overall, he is a very good kid. We thought he would be jealous of Miles, but it has been the exact opposite. He loves him so much. When he hears him in the morning, he wants to climb into his bed to be with him. When he cries, he wants to comfort him. When I pick him up from school, he asks about him. “I want to see baby Miles,” he says. And he means it. I am so proud of who he is and who he is becoming. 

Today was Valentine’s Day. Typically you think of romantic dinners, time between two lovebirds, etc. Well, for this family of four, it was a usual Sunday filled with lots of family fun. Do I miss those romantic times with my wife? Sometimes. However, what she has given me means so much more and I would not have it any other way. 

One month down…

Miles turned one month old on Friday and will be 5 weeks old tomorrow. Time is slowly drifting by and the days are mixed between great and hard. On the hard days I am sleep deprived, unsure of when I last fed him or if I remembered to make Jacob a lunch for school. On great days miles sleeps long chunks and I get laundry, dishes and dinner done without any problems. On the best days my mom comes to help and I get a long nap in the middle of the day. I am so grateful to have family nearby to help out when needed. 
Jacob is finally adjusting and starting to stay in his bed at night rather than coming to our room. He gets in a little trouble at school, but I think it is mostly him being a toddler. He loves Miles and asks about him a lot. “Is Miles awake? Is Miles happy? Mommy, get Miles!” He also loves Miles’ toes just like he loves ours. 
I am enjoying my time with my little ones and looking forward to getting cleared by my doctor to start doing more. I will soon be able to lift heavier things (like Jacob!) and exercise to start working off some baby weight. For now I will just enjoy these early days and all the cuddles.